falling out of love

   When should you listen to your heart? When it screams at you to leave or when it pleads with you to stay?

   All I want is for him to look at me like he used to, like he couldn’t believe I chose him, couldn’t believe I loved him as much as he loved me. But he barely glances my way. Now his phone is glued to his hand, his eyes fixed on the television screen. He talks. He laughs. Just not with me. I asked if he still loves me; he says he does. I was too scared to ask if he was still in love with me. There is a difference, but only women seem to know it. A man in love can’t keep his hands off you, or his eyes. A man in love wants you near him. He wants to hear you laugh, wants to touch you, feel you underneath him, breathing hard as you make love. A man in love sees a life beyond the end of the football season, a life with his woman by his side.

But when you fall out of love, then what happens?

    There is pain, because I know. I know he can’t wait to get me out the door. I know he can’t stand the look of hurt on my face, but he stopped caring enough to make it better. I know that he doesn’t see forever anymore, now it’s just until next time.

But neither of us says anything. Why?

I’m scared because if either of us says it out loud then it’s really over, and until then I can always pretend. Hope. Maybe it’s all in my head. ..